I’ve been doing this gig for awhile now but never have I reviewed…sexy chocolate, or maybe it’s just sex chocolate, I really don’t know. At any rate, I was informed that Ann Summers had a sale on their online store and two of their chocolate products were reduced to just £1 each with free shipping, so I picked them both up. They arrived yesterday and I figured today I would review these chocolate rabbits.

The question you can see on the front of the tin these rabbits come in is pretty straight forward: ‘Better than sex?’ Well it’s my quest to find out. The top half of the tin has a woman holding a chocolate rabbit in her outstretched arm. The back of the tin is a little more plain, simply white text on a black background where they list the ingredients which are fairly simple, and at the bottom there’s a big message in capital letters reading ‘THIS IS AN ADULT PRODUCT’. Now I’m almost a little scared, when I open the tin will some sort of sex object pop out at me?

Well the answer is no. Instead there’s a plastic packet with all these dusty, scratched up chocolate rabbits inside. I opened the bag and poured them into the tin and they just about fit. Now I’ll be honest here, they look and smell terrible. Opening the bag up and seeing these all scuffed up and chipped is not a good first impression, and they just smell cheap.

That’s how they taste too. They taste like cheap Easter Egg chocolate that’s been sat in grandma’s cupboard for too long. Stale, tasteless, nothing but disappointing. I’m sorry Ann Summers, but back to the drawing board with this one. The only sex this is better than is sex with your aforementioned grandma, or with a cheap hooker who leaves you with an STD. Stay away.